With Miller Lite being the official beer of the Mustached American community — and a Mustached American can only drink beer 18 hours of the day — our people need an alternative beverage.

Enter the good people at Flatt Cola.

Flatt, the official soft drink of women with A-cups everywhere, has purchased $500 worth of tickets to ‘Stache Bash 2011 in Chicago that the soft drink will give away to people interested in attending the event.

Flatt Cola provides a boost of sugar, caffeine and Vitamin Clike. And AMI science has demonstrated that when used in combination with a ruggedly attractive mustache, Flatt Cola may lead to an erection lasting four hours or longer for which you should not seek medical attention.

The free tickets will be available though Flatt Cola’s Facebook page, to listeners of 97.9 FM The Loop, and various Chicago-area blogs

For more information, email info@AmericanMustacheInstitute.org or call us at 877-STACHE-1.

Carry on.